13.Journal Entry - "In the Field"

You can't help but notice that everyone thinks they are to blame for the death of Kiowa. Jimmy Cross thinks it was his fault because he stationed the soldiers in the field even though he had a gut feeling that it wasn't right. However a young soldier also thinks it was his fault because he was discussing a picture of a girl and he turned on a flashlight to show Kiowa, it was then that the field started to explode. Bowker also felt it was his fault he died too because he couldn't pull him from the mud due to the smell of the field. I think that everyone goes through life feeling some sort of blame for something that they probably didn't have a whole lot to do with. Everything happens for a reason and pointing fingers doesn't resolve anything.

12.Journal Entry -"Notes"

I really like this chapter alot because we are told the true story of which happened to Norman Bowker in the form of a letter. Tim O'Brien tried to incorporate it into a different book but ended up cutting it out because it never fit into the time frame. However three years after Bowker wrote the letter to O'Brien he hung himself which I think effected him alot. When Bowker tells us in his letter that he cant move on from the war, that he feels like he is stuck, and cant find a meaningfull use of his life I feel that O'Brien understands. I think that he really gets it, that he knows that people cant just move on from it because it honestly does effect the rest of their lives with all the experiences that they endure. Im glad that this got written and that the reader gets a feel of just how much trouble soldiers have after the war. It makes me want to start some program where soldiers can go and talk about everything that happened so they can move on, just like O'Brien with his stories.

11.Journal Entry - "Speaking of Courage"

This chapter is about after the war when Norman Bowker goes home, we learn about his town and the lake. I think that the lake is significant symbol in this chapter. He drives around and around the seven-mile loop ten times reminiscing on the medals that he won. It was a total of seven medals and he knew his dad would be very proud of these, but then he remembers what he didn't win - the silver star. As he drives around the lake he imagines the conversation that would happen between him and his father when he told the story of why he wasn't courageous enough to win this certain medal. Now when dark comes and the fireworks start Bowker wades into the water and watches them. I think that the lake is symbolizing the field of muck where Kiowa had died. Its almost like he wants to go back to that moment to change his actions and try and save Kiowa.

10.Journal Entry - "Style"

We learn about a small village where most of the houses had been burned to the ground and there was pretty much nothing left. You hear nothing because there "was no music" but still you see this young girl dancing "with her eyes half closed, her feet bare." We are told that her entire family had been burned and she was the only one left in the entire village. Throughout the story she doesn't stop dancing, she does "a graceful movement with her hips" and moves right and left, back and forth. When they were leaving they thought maybe it was some weird ritual, but Henry Dobbins explained that she "just liked to dance."
       This shows how humans can find happiness even in times of despair and when all hope has been lost. We have the ability to block out things we don't want to know, or choose to forget. Sometimes it works for the better but other times its just stalling from the brutal spiral to the ground.

9.Journal Entry - "Ambush"

Tim O'Brien writes about his younger daughter in the chapter Ambush, along with a few other chapters, her name is Kathleen and she is nine years old. O'Brien tells us of the questions that she asks him, like why he writes these war stories? However the one that is truly significant is when she asks if he had ever "killed somebody." He tells us "it was a difficult moment, but [he] did what seemed right" which in this case was to tell her "of course not." I think that this was a good idea to lie to her because she is so young to fully understand the war and why so many deaths occured. Also he continues to say that he "hope['s] she'll ask again" so he can tell her "exactly what happened."
            Even though she is just a little girl, she still see's right through her dads cover, with reference to why he keeps writing all these war stories. She knows that there is a reason behind it and I hope that she never gives up on him.

8.Journal Entry - "The Man I Killed"

Tim O'Brien didnt seem like the type of character to kill a man, and we notice how his actions towards the dead man reveals this. He constantly goes over what the man looked like, giving us grusome description of the death and how it was after. He continues to imagine the life of his victim and tell the readers who he could of been, and what sort of life he should have grown up to have. You can tell its a hard time for O'Brien because he gives the silent treatment to Kiowa who is trying to get him up and out of his mind set. O'Briens guilt lays on his shoulders and haunts him, he cant seem to get over the life of this "dainty young man" with a "star shaped hole" in one of his eyes. Time passes, and still Tim ignores Kiowa's attempt to talk about the killing, he is torturing himself by not letting going, and continuing to over look the situation and add a story about the "lightly freackled" man.

7.Journal Entry - "Church"

When the soldiers found an almost abondoned pagonda they set up camp and stayed there for a while. They made friends with the monks, well for the most part because they didnt necesarily speak english. None of the soldiers really seemed to care a whole lot about the monks except Kiowa, he was the one soldier that carried a New Testiment. However it was Dobbins who said he might "join up with" the monks after the war, which was weird because he wasnt "all that religious." We find out that as a boy he grew up in the church, and "in highschool [he] started to think how [he'd] like to be a minister." He goes on to tell us he wouldnt be smart enough, because you needed to be sharp and have brains. Although he doesnt want to be a minister in the end, he still wants to be nice and just be a decent person to those who deserve it.